Let us not underestimate how hard it is to be compassionate. Compassion is hard because it requires the inner disposition to go with others to the place where they are weak, vulnerable, lonely, and broken. But this is not our spontaneous response to suffering. What we desire most is to do away with suffering by fleeing from it or finding a quick cure for it. As busy, active, relevant ministers, we want to earn our bread by making a real contribution. This means first and foremost doing something to show that our presence makes a difference. And so we ignore our greatest gift, which is our ability to enter into solidarity with those who suffer. Those who can sit in silence with their fellowman, not knowing what to say but knowing that they should be there, can bring new life in a dying heart. Those who are not afraid to hold a hand in gratitude, to shed tears in grief and to let a sigh of distress arise straight from the heart can break through paralyzing boundaries and witness the birth of a new fellowship, the fellowship of the broken.
-Henri Nouwen
If I am honest with myself, not all my precepts are reflections of shiney happy people holding hands. Nope. Not at all.
Precept: Sometimes %@#&! is just %@#&!. This is different from the defeatist "%@#&! Happens." I am not suggesting we suck it up. I am not suggesting that we lie down and take it. I am not suggesting "weak resignation." I am suggesting strong resignation (Thanks, Beth.). What I have discovered for myself is the difference between redemptive suffering (See the inset.) and plain old %@#&!. I am not convinced that all %@#&! is redemptive. God can redeem me in spite of my %@#&!. But sometimes the %@#&! remains none the less and my trying to make an object lesson from it is nonsense and perhaps even hubris.
This is a fallen world. Horrible things happen for no good reason all the time. People fall from mountain while on vacation with their families. People can be eaten by wild beasts. You can slip and fall on your front stoop and die. This happens all the time. I ministered to people in the middle of these crises in the hospital.
People can do horrible and evil things for no good reason...sometimes even disguised as a good reason, but really for no good reason at all. Chaos is still present. Sin is real. As such, %@#&! will fall upon us.
Our work is to discern (and this may take a long, long time) if our suffering is redemptive or not. We can assume redemption and go from there, or venture from the other end of the suffering scale. But I have a very real problem with defaulting to the "It's God's will" school of thought. It does not fly. So, I have been utilizing the "Sometimes %@#&! is just %@#&!" precept for years.
I firmly believe that there is redemptive suffering...or that our wounds can become the vehicles for someone else's salvation. And as such vehicles, they can lead to our own renewal and health. I have no doubt in this. But sometimes %@#&! is just %@#&!. And we have to be willing to say that as well.
I share this in the spirit of candor and not in the invitation of theological debate. So, feel free to comment and question. But know that this is a fairly raw place for me. I might not enter into debate with you. I will, as always, post your comment...unless you are a cialis vendor from Athens. You need to go away.
Posted by tripp at March 1, 2007 11:43 AMThis is just to let you know that I've been here and read this... and that I don't want to sell you any Cialis. :)
Posted by: Megan at March 1, 2007 05:58 PM