conjectural navel gazing; jesus in lint form

last day

Today is my last day with the Trauma Team. The grant proposal is in. We shall see if I get some money for this thing. I will be writing two more proposals as we go along. I have to cover my bases.

I will miss the Trauma Team and the SICU. They are very dear to me.

My next unit is pediatrics. This means I bring my guitar to work every day and the collar/tie garb is optional. Sometimes the peds chaplain actually comes to work in jeans! Who knew?

This should also be the last day I post from Susie's computer. My hope is that hot water and such exist at the apartment. We shall see.

Y'all be good.

Oh! Check out the forum. Under church and state (again) is another article about the filibuster. It includes a poll as well. I think I figured out how anyone can participate. We shall see.

the place of experience

Here is some navel gazing for you.

I have been musing this morning on the place of experience in our faith journies. Some, it would seem, want to banish experience to absolute subjectivity. Others are so wed to it that it trumps all else. It becomes The Objective Truth. Some fall somewhere in the middle where experience is possiblty a signifier of God, but should not be taken too seriously lest we make an idol of our own lives.

But here is the thing for me. I tend toward the "trump" end of the spectrum. I know, this surprises many. But here it helps to be honest. I think that many underestimate the power of experience. It can overcome all thinking and education. It can overcome all understanding. One may understand that the church, for example, is supposed to be "X", but if we consistantly experience it as "Y", then the church is "Y". Nothing can undo what the experience has done. Experience, as they say, is reality.

A wise nun once said to me that "God requires the heart." Experience is the battleground of the heart. Experience is why some seek out congregations that embody what we believe to be true about the church. Simply holding the thoughts or beliefs on our own may not be enough. Others may find faith communities within artist communities, choirs, families, work, or the local gym. Experience matters that much. Our hearts may reside in our experiences.

Now, that may be a pretty hard polemic. I share it not to describe some prescriptive notion of church or any other Body. I share it as a descriptive. One may experience Orthodoxy as salvific. Thus it is. One may experience the baptist traditions as salvific. Thus, they are. Perhaps your marriage is where you experience your slavation to the exclusion of all other relationships and communities. T%hese institutions and relationships become the place where we place our trust. Other institutions fall to the side as "untrue" or "untrustworthy."

Our experience matters that much.

Now, it is possible that by making that much of experience, we actually make a mistake. I will admit to that. This is where our experiences run all willy nilly, confusing thought and perhaps keeping us from experiencing healing or enjoyment from other places and relationships. I certainly do this.

I have been pondering this stuff because of a couple of the comments to the post on Sunday School. In other conversations I have had about this post, it is very clear to me that our experience as children of church, scripture and community absolutely influences how we experience God's grace for the remainder of our lives. How we understand church, scripture and community, its trustworthiness and message may be dictated to us as children.

Stacy and Justin very much enjoyed their experiences as children. It has helped them to remain loyal to their traditions even in the midst of conflict. My experience was almost non-existant, and what I did experience was either vapid or superfluous. I came to God through another institution I trusted, the university...and eventually a monestary. Even as a pastor, I still struggle to trust the congregation/church. This is not to say that I do not trust the congregation/church. It is simply that I find that trust a challenge to maintain and uphold. Seminary and monasticism have always been more nurturing, more trustworthy...certainly not perfect, but a place of growth and well-being. I experience them differently, and that experience matters.

My experience is not to overshadow the experience of others by any means. It is simply my experience. But as a weak person, depending upon the support and kindness of community as the Body of Christ. I still find myself gravitating toward those places that hold me up, those places I first learned to trust, those places where I found the God I knew already resided in my heart.

because I can

This is a picture of me and my wife about a year ago at graduation from seminary.
My she's good lookin'.

Author shares 10 components of healthy children's ministries...

I am posting this as part of my thinking around something Jane Ellen said last week at a meeting. It is increasingly clear to me that I know less about children's ministry than I would like. I need to learn more...much more. Not that I want to make too much of it, but not experiencing Sunday School as a child but once or twice has a lot to do with it. Still, how much should that matter? Should people who were kids in church be the only one to speak to kids in church? Highly doubtful.

By David Winfrey

LOUISVILLE, Ky. (ABP) -- "Parents are the missing element of children's
ministry," an author and children's-ministry consultant told a
conference in Louisville, Ky., April 23.

Too many churches are working off the 1970s model of recruiting a paid
or volunteer worker to "baby-sit" children while the adults hold their
worship service, said Art Murphy, author of The Faith of a Child. "It's
not the job of the 10 percent to do 90 percent of the work," he said.
"That's called unhealthy."

But successful children's ministries today involve parents in the work
with children and equip adults to be Christian parents and role models
throughout the week.

Parental involvement was one of 10 components Murphy said make up a
strong children's ministry. Other components of a healthy ministry, he
said, are:

-- Bible truth. "This is our power source," he said, referring to both
Bible facts and Christian doctrine. Children's ministries can reinforce
such truth, he added, by teaching kids to memorize Bible verses and
lists, such as the fruit of the Spirit.

-- Bible application. In addition to teaching Bible truth, children's
workers should be teaching what that truth means in age-appropriate
ways, Murphy said.

Noting that some educators want to teach children more than they can
take in, Murphy compared it to trying to teach a 6-year-old to avoid
adultery. The goal, he added, is not for children to know everything
about the Old Testament's Daniel "but [to know] they want to be a
Daniel."

-- Shepherding. Shepherding involves not only caring for children but
also observing them so that workers learn how best to care for those in
their ministry, he said.

-- Safety. This is the most important topic for visiting families,
Murphy noted. "This is a different day, folks, and it's not about the
members. It's about the ones outside," he said. Children's ministries
should be concerned about emotional safety as well as physical safety,
he noted, including such issues as bullies, teasing, nicknames and
labels.

-- Trained and adequate staff. Training includes children's evangelism
as well as understanding how to treat a 4-year-old differently from a
4th grader, Murphy said. Adequate includes having the right ratio of
adults to children. He said ministries should have one adult for every
two babies; one adult for every four preschoolers; one adult for every
five elementary school children; and one adult for every seven or eight
preteens.

-- Facilities. Child-friendly facilities "say we like kids and kids like
it here," Murphy said. "A lot of our facilities could use a touch-up."

-- Special events. Four or five special events each year tell the
children they're important to the church. They also offer children and
parents opportunities to invite other children, Murphy said.

-- Music. Christian music can help equip children to face a
non-Christian world, he said. "We want to give them some tools that
work, and music is a powerful tool," he said. "It's easier to remember
songs than it is a Bible verse, sometimes."

-- Play. Churches that offer play help children interact and get
exercise, Murphy said. "You'll have more discipline, they are never late
anymore, and they bring their friends."

Every church's children's ministry should aim to equip children to have
two thoughts throughout the week, Murphy said: "What would God want me
to do in this situation?" and "I can't wait until next Sunday."

One simple change any church can make is to change the name of its
children's Sunday school. Approximately 45 percent of the churches
Murphy talks to are using such names as Kid's Zone.

"If you love Sunday school ... please change the name, because it sounds
worse than Saturday school," he said.

early blogging and inarticulate rants?

Good morning, all.

Trish has to get up early to finish some sewing she has been doing for her latest show, Macbeth. The show opens this weekend with a prieview on Thursday and an opening gala on Friday. I will probably go to the preview. I have seen bits of the show. It is an interesting take on The Bard's work. The director has taken the interesting historical tidbit of James I'st interest in the occult and expanded the role of the witches somewhat. Trish is a witch. I will probably never be able to say such a thing about my wife on this blog again, so let me do so: Trish is a witch.

Come see my wife, the witch. She weilds a mean incantation or two.

In other news, I have posted two articles to the forum. The first is about how the Southern Baptist Convention is withdrawing support of a congregational lobbying bill. The second is about some gun legislation that has passed through the Florida legislature. Ooo this one has me hot. Grr. What the heck is all this about? How lost are we? Shitte.

And with that, I bid you adieu.

Exeunt

sometimes...

Larry posted at the Reconciler blog about our current worship space woes. I have to say that as heartbreaking as it is, installing Larry the same Sunday we found out about all the drama was perfect. There could be no better response.

Pray that we find a new space soon.

If you know anyone or anyplace, please don't hesitate to share the information.

too funny

It seems that if one googles "dealing with the mega church" (quotes included) only one entry comes up. www.anglobaptist.org

Who knew?

Then again, it may be a fluke.

blogging from SWTS

Well, I am blogging on a Mac. It belongs to Susie. My computer is comfortably refrigerated in my office which is in my unheated apartment.

So, in response to this recent aquisition of air-conditioning, Trish and I are staying with friends at Seabury. It is a great kindness. I am worried for my friends who have to stay in the building. I am hoping that they too have places to go until the situation improves.

I am still tired. I figured out that I was up for almost 40 hours this weekend. That is something my body no longer tolerates. I managed seven hours of sleep last night. Tonight I hope for the same. Seven hours is a goodly amount of sleep for me. I think I could snooze right now.

Okay, peace and all good things to you all. I am off to play with a friend for a bit. There are many great things about being at the alma mater.

two ways to see a thing

Well, after my post, we got hit hard. We had ten new trauma patients roll in this weekend. That is heavy even for us. So, people are "wore out." I am tried and cranky and I am one of many. Pray for us.

And that leads me to the title to this post.

One doctor said "It feels like 666 was written over the whole weekend." After a conversation with Micah and Laura last night, I am thinking that this may be true, but the LORD reveals himself in the midst of Hell. There is light in the darkness. We are here to heal and to see people through the most difficult grief. May God's light shine through the darkness. May we be God's light.

good news

Today was a good day for Reconciler. The meeting about the Community of the Holy Trinity wentwell. Reconciler finallyt opened its own bank account. North Shore Baptist approved our grant proposal. We do not know how much we might receive, but that is wonderful news indeed. Wow. Very cool. And, it would seem, some of the powers that be in the Diocese of Chicago were speaking about us. Now, I cannopt say if that was "Oh. My. God! Can you believe what they are trying to do there in Rogers Park? What gall! It is to laugh." Or if it was more like, "We had better see what they are up to. We might be missing out on a great opportunity to support something important."

I refuse to gamble here, but I am hopeful for the latter.

orthopods

I was speaking to one of the orthopods (That is what we call the group of orthopedic surgeons.) this evening. He said he had a bad feeling about tonight. Great. That's what I wanted to hear. We are hoping that the coolness of the weather keeps people in.

No motorcycles.
No jungle gyms.

It is too cold. Stay home tonight. Have a cup of tea and call someone you love. I will be here until 8:30am if you need me. But I would rather be bored, thank you very much.

Expressing that desire, of course, will mean that I will stay busy all night long.

[Yeah, I was right. It is 03:32 and I have been busy since 23:00. Oy. Hey. People. Enjoy your beer, but don't drive. C'mon. It's like I am at a 12 step meeting in the ER tonight. Urggle.]

wardrobe

Larry had something interesting to say about how we dress. Strangely, after wearing a collar at the hopspital for the past several months, I must agree with him.

Who knew?

You can find more in the extended link.

A question for me was how to dress. I do at times wear a Rusian style cassock, and I did debate whether or not to wear it. I didn't feel comfortable for some reason wearing to Jane's ordination. To do so seemed pretentious somehow. Then I realized once at the Cathedral that I had dressed the part of a Covenant pastor, nice suit jacket, dress shirt (no tie I do not wear ties, though the tie is the Covenant clerical collar) and a cross. (admitedly a more urban Goth version of the Covenant pastor look, but Covenant pastor none the less.) I fell more comfortable in the cassock actually, but it doesn't really represent my tradition very well. I came as a Covenant Pastor to Jane's ordination, which is exactly how I should have come. This does however raise the questin of how to present myself when Jane is ordained a priest.

Tripp btw wore a clerical colar, which I think suits him. I don't think he looks teribly episcopal in it either. To me, he looks like a baptist in a clerical collar, which to my mind is a good thing.

[I did like that part especially. - Ed.]

If you are reading this and think, what does dress have to do with anything of faith and pastoring and the church, I will say everything. Christian faith is supposed to have form. There is very little in fact that is abstract, "purely spiritual" and disimbodied about Christian faith. The foci of our religious faith are intensly bodily and about form. Our central act of worship is centered on eating and drinking, we enter the faith by either being emersed in water, having watter poured over us or sprinkled with water in Baptism. We anoint people with oil for healing, we ordain people through the laying on of hands. These forms are not accidental for the Christians but are primary (except if you are Quaker, but I kindly and respectfully submit to the Quakers that they are the exception and the deviation from how the faith has been understood for most of the history of Christianity). So, what I wear as a pastor has not only meaning but cannot be laid asside as without consequence.

Plus even if the above was not so dress is a symbolic activity. How we dress speaks to those we meet, it also forms our sense of ourselves. While many people may think that I ignore this aspect of dress, I am actualy very careful in how I dress and what I communicate with that dress. One may not like what I say, or you may misinterpret what I am communicating with my dress, but it is deliberate. Such deliberation even when it is shocking to some is, I think, what it means to be fully human embodied and valueing the body as the temple of the holy spirit.

trauma fellowship

And so it goes...

I have been playing with the draft of our proposal this morning during rounds. The trauma team is very interested in my staying on for another year. This is a good thing. Advocacy helps tons.

So, I have been chatting about the grant and my profile. I can't put all my eggs in one basket here. I have to be looking for a church position as well. I will also be checking out www.npo.net and www.idealist.org to see what they have been up to of late. Not-for-profits often want people with MDiv's. This is a good thing. It is time to start looking for work. My position here ends in four months. Wow.

If you are interested, I have posted the "responsibilities" that I will have as trauma chaplain in the extended link. It is a little overwhelming, I must admit.

The fellow will demonstrate knowledge, attitudes, and skills to address the following: ~ Become familiar with barriers to patients and families accepting traumatic life changing events ~ Master advanced principles in spiritual suffering and other disagreeable symptoms encountered by patients and or family, and become familiar with the complex issues that have surfaced regarding patient and family experiences of suffering.

~ Become skilled in psychosocial and spiritual assessment and support for patients and families facing a lengthy illness, including attention to young adults.

~ Understand how to understand, assess and manage traumatic loss and bereavement in all its forms.

~ Enhance basic communication skills for trauma care, particularly delivering bad news, discussing patient values and goals, how to develop a comfortable, trusting relationship with patients and families in the face of considerable anxiety or denial, and principals of patient and family education.

~ Become familiar with how cultural issues, including ethnic and racial factors, influence attitudes and practices in the face of death and dying for patients and their families

~ Develop an understanding of ethical principles and issues in spiritual care, including contemporary approaches to advance care planning and substituted judgment and the debate over futile and stopping treatment.

~ Become familiar with the utilization and recruitment of sub acute facilities for disabled persons and relevant clinical knowledge and skills.

~ Learn about working effectively with an interdisciplinary team: the roles of the nurse, social worker, bereavement coordinator, volunteers, and physicians in trauma teams, and about approaches to handling staff stress and conflict.

~ Become more aware of the personal stresses in working with the traumatically injured and their families, and of sources of personal support.

~ Appreciate the special opportunities in consultative work of working with and teaching the entire health care team, addressing their particular concerns and learning needs in every trauma care consultation

~ Become familiar with evidence-based trauma spiritual care practice, utilizing the principle texts of Trauma medicine and spiritual care and the growing journal literature on trauma care.

~ Become familiar with local and national organizations and programs directed toward enhancing Trauma and Spiritual Care.

~ Learn about and practice educational approaches appropriate to teaching about Trauma care for learners at various stages of clinical training and experience, focusing on assessing and changing attitudes and communication skills.

~ Participate in initiatives to improve the assessment and management of the traumatically injured, and thus become acquainted with educational research, systems interventions, operations improvement, and outcomes measures.

~ Design and implement a brief research project or literature review that can be presented and published.

Well, that should keep me busy for two years, no?

scratch my head interesting

Ratzinger on war

"There were not sufficient reasons to unleash a war against
Iraq. To say nothing of the fact that, given the new weapons
that make possible destructions that go beyond the combatant
groups, today we should be asking ourselves if it is still licit
to admit the very existence of a 'just war.'"

- Joseph Cardinal Ratzinger, now Pope Benedict XVI, May 2, 2003.

I posted this in the forum as well...under "theology."

pastoral profile

[Editor's note: Argh! I just set the essay up in plain text and it is 40 lines! In Word it is 35! Argh. I have to pay to make changes once I submit the essay to the appropriate authorities. Oy. I have to trim. Bugger.]

[Another Editor's note: The secretary from the denominational office had this to say: "The best way to send it is to go by the character count - not to exceed 3000 characters - including spaces and punctuation and save it in rich text format (rtf)." WHEW!!]

Okay, so I have this "no more than 3000 character (including spaces and punctuation), 37 lines" essay to write to complete my pastoral profile. I am finding the task daunting. The purpose is to introduce myself somehow and share my theology and share my idea of leadership and and and...

It will be presented along side a bubbled preset list of attributes and skills data base. So, Some of who I am is there. I do not need to list employment history and the like. The data will give voice to my experience as a musician, my work in the hospital and with AIDS service organizations. It is exhaustive.

This essay is giving me fits. I like what it says now. It is earnest. That is good. I am not sure it is all that personal, however, and that troubles me. So, I thought I would post it here and see what you all think. Any congregation who reads it will also find out about this blog, so they will have access to me in one dimension, at least. There are photos in the gallery, etc. This is all good. And maybe that will be enough.

I know some readers of this blog have already received the most recent draft in an email. I am curious about what the rest of you think. Let me know.

The essay follows.

God has come to me in the midst of my own brokenness and confusion as a force of love and charity. All that I do as pastor is to be a reflection upon and a repetition of God’s healing and saving actions in my own life. How can I do more than witness to God’s grace in my own life and hope for God’s revelation in the lives of others? Ubi caritas et amor, Deus ibi est. Where there is charity and love, God himself is there. If ever there was a hymn which transformed my soul, it is that one. As a husband, a pastor and a musician, this ancient hymn guides me.

Charity and love are to be embodied in the day-to-day life of a congregation if a congregation is to grow into discipleship as a worshiping community of believers. As we act as the Body of Christ for the world, we must hold these virtues as paramount. A congregation embodies God’s love and charity, meeting all people where they are. I believe that the worship life of a congregation is the primary place to learn to be Christian. My study of the history and traditions of the Church combined with my work as a musician have led me to a deep and abiding love for the liturgy and worship life of the Church. Worship is both an expression of our faith and a profound influence upon our faith. The hymn, Ubi caritas, bears witness to how liturgy and worship shaped my faith. Worship calls us together as community. Worship is how the Christian community has chosen to express itself before God and the world. It is where we learn and share our experiences and frustrations in living out the virtues of our faith. It is where our study of scripture, our relationships with one another and our work together for God’s Kingdom are given context.

Similarly, charity and love are to be embodied in the life of the denomination as we struggle along side our Baptist brothers and sisters in the midst of the challenges of theological diversity. It means that I must make room for those who disagree with me on many issues. Love and charity beget humility. I am not the Church. The Church is a Body with a long history and tradition whose head, Christ, is eternal. I believe that it is with great care and compassion that we must work through our differences. We are all in one another’s care.

Finally, charity and love are to be embodied within our Baptist tradition’s relationship with other Christian traditions. Charity and love motivate my ecumenical work. An ecumenical community shaped much of my thinking and belief about God and God’s Church. We Christians must come together to speak to love and charity and show the world a unified Church and not a divided and splintered Body. I believe this is the work of congregation, denomination and all Christian traditions. It is my vision for God’s people and my hope for my work as a pastor.

blogging from the home of orthodoxy

Hey.

No hot water at my place. Somehow the gas bill was not paid. Surprisingly, I had nothing to do with it. No flakes here, boy! So, I called Cliff and he let me come over this morning to shower. Trish decided to shower at North Shore. Oy.

As I type this I am sitting in the Healy livingroom. Sofie is dancing. Cliff is trying to make yet another excuse as to why his young daughter is not wearing pants. He said something about "potty training" but I am not convinced. Wild living, I say.

Se y'all at the hospital!

last night's fun

So, last night at rehearsal...well...how do I say this? Synchronicity. It is cool.

We have rehearsed outside twice now. The weather has been unseasonably warm of late and we like to take advantage of it. This time went as well as last. We played through a bunch of pieces. We fooled around. Being outside means that we attract a bit of a crowd. Well, "crowd" would be too strong a word. Some people will stop by and listen. We play on some benches on Clark Street, so people walking their dogs or walking home from work will stop by. Last night was particularly interesting. One woman actually gave us a six-pack of beer! Unreal. I did not partake, of course, but wow.

This guy, Roger, walked by and said "Dudes! Are you all gonna be playing for a while? I have to go to work, but I have an upright bass upstairs in my apartment and would love to jam if you all will be around." We agreed, of course. It would appear that our nomadic and industrious bassist is a sound engineer for a local sound studio. So, he returned later with his bass. Roger is tallish himself, so schlepping the bass was not all that great an effort. I know people look like their pets, but can you look like your instrument of choice?

This was the first time we have ever played with the support of the bass. Oh. My. God. We all had a great time. Roger said that he would love to continue playing with us. Tuesday rehearsals work for him. The upcomming gigs especially work for him. Wow. We may have a bass player.

So, between Roger and John, who also plays bass as well as drum, bones and myriad whistles, it would seem our little band grows. I wonder if we could work in two bassists. Hmm...

Oh. My.

separation of church and state news

I posted the complete article here in the forum. I also included a poll. Please take a moment to stop by and let me know what you think.

"One in three high-school students in this republic says that the First Amendment of the Constitution of the United States goes too far in the rights it guarantees to you as a citizen," Shurden said, citing a recent Knight Foundation survey of 100,000 high-school students. "These are astonishing and inconceivable attitudes for high-school students in the United States of America. This is a scary phone call in the middle of the night about what has happened in our nation."

this from cnn

Pope Benedict XVI's tenure has been met with speculation already...

Opposed to relativism

There had been a great deal of speculation about who would be chosen to succeed John Paul II, who died April 2 at age 84.

John Paul was widely credited with extending the reach of the papacy. He spoke more than a dozen languages and set an unprecedented pattern of pastoral travel, drawing huge crowds all over the world.

He was also strictly traditional on issues of sexuality and the role of women in the church, which won him support among some Catholics but alienated others. Similar disagreement exists over the next pontiff's stances on issues such as birth control, stem cell research and the ordination of female priests.

Benedict XVI, however, has been critical of progressive Catholicism. In a homily delivered at Monday's Eligendo Summo Pontifice Mass before the cardinals began the conclave, he warned against "relativism, which is letting oneself be 'swept along by every wind of teaching.' (It) looks like the only attitude acceptable) to today's standards. We are moving towards a dictatorship of relativism, which does not recognize anything as for certain and which has as its highest goal one's own ego and one's own desires."

All I can do is be patient and discover what he really means by this. I think that there is more than one kind of relativism.

pope benedict the xvi

Ratzinger has been elected Pope.

Keep him and all Catholics in your prayers as this transition continues. There are a great many challenges that face the new Pope. May God grant Benedict wisdom.

alliance of baptists and sexuality

Here is one Baptist body that has done some thinking on human sexuality that is, well, out of step with some of the more prominent Baptist voices we hear of late.

Bryan posted about some of the current ABC stances on human sexuality. He mentioned the Alliance in another post, so I thought I would hunt around to see what they had to say.

pdf

wicca and public prayer

Okay, this is cool.

When [Simpson] asked to be put on a list of those who could lead invocations at board meetings, the county attorney told her she would not be allowed, claiming that "Chesterfield's non-sectarian invocations are
traditionally made to a divinity that is consistent with the Judeo-Christian tradition."

Yeah, this bodes well. Read the rest of the article in the extended link. This is why the separation of church and state is so important. It is either all or nothing. We have religious freedom or we don't. I should be able to pray to Jesus in public and this woman should be able to pray as her tradition dictates as well. Not everyone will like it. Heck, I am often asked to avoid praying by patients because they are still frustrated by religion in general. This case happened near my home town. I have to say that I am facinated by the whole thing.

Federal court rules against Wiccan in municipal prayer dispute

By Robert Marus

WASHINGTON (ABP) -- A federal appeals court has ruled that a Virginia
county can exclude a member of a minority religion from offering prayers at county board meetings -- even though adherents of "Judeo-Christian" religions are allowed to lead invocations.

In a unanimous ruling April 14, a three-judge panel of the 4th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals ruled against county resident Cynthia Simpson, whom officials denied the opportunity to offer prayers at meetings of the Chesterfield County Board of Supervisors.

Simpson is a practitioner of Wicca, a neo-pagan religion that she has described as interchangeable with witchcraft. She is a leader in a Wiccan congregation in the suburban county near Richmond. When she asked to be put on a list of those who could lead invocations at board meetings, the county attorney told her she would not be allowed, claiming that "Chesterfield's non-sectarian invocations are traditionally made to a divinity that is consistent with the Judeo-Christian tradition."

Simpson, working with attorneys from a pair of civil-liberties groups, sued the county. A federal district judge in Richmond sided with her, ruling in 2003 that the practice unconstitutionally discriminated against religions that do not stem from the dominant Western monotheistic traditions.

But the latest ruling reverses that decision, citing the Supreme Court's 1985 Marsh vs. Chambers decision allowing "non-sectarian" legislative prayers before the Nebraska legislature. Judge J. Harvie Wilkinson III, authoring the 4th Circuit's opinion, said the content of the prayers Chesterfield County officials allowed was broad enough, and the fact that Simpson was barred from offering one was immaterial to the case.

"The Judeo-Christian tradition is, after all, not a single faith but an umbrella covering many faiths," Wilkinson wrote. "We need not resolve the parties' dispute as to its precise extent, as Chesterfield County has spread it wide enough in this case to include Islam. For these efforts, the County should not be made the object of constitutional condemnation."

Wilkinson has been widely rumored to be among the candidates for a Supreme Court appointment, should any slots on that body come open before the end of President Bush's term.

The judge went on to say that the Marsh decision means governments have wider latitude in dealing with religious expression in legislative contexts without offending the First Amendment clause that prohibits government establishment of religion than in other contexts -- such as public schools.

Wilkinson continued: "The Chesterfield policy of clergy selection may
not encompass as much as Simpson would like, and were it to be applied beyond the 'unique' and limited context of legislative prayer, it may not encompass as much as [another Supreme Court decision on government-sponsored prayers] would require. But that context is all important, for if Marsh means anything, it is that the Establishment Clause does not scrutinize legislative invocations with the same rigor that it appraises other religious activities."

A Baptist expert on church-state issues said the case was wrongly decided. "The clearest command of the Establishment Clause, and even [of] fundamental fairness, is that the state must not prefer one religion over another," said Brent Walker, executive director of the Washington-based Baptist Joint Committee for Religious Liberty.
Walker also said the suit is indicative of the problems with using public prayers to solemnize government activities. "This case points out the difficulty with public legislative prayer in a religiously
pluralistic society," he said. "The government always is involved in picking and choosing."

Simpson may appeal the decision to the Supreme Court or ask for the full 4th Circuit to re-hear the case. In a similar case last year, another three-judge panel of the same court outlawed a South Carolina town's practice of allowing only Christian prayers at town council meetings.

A spokesman for one of the groups that helped Simpson file her lawsuit, Americans United for Separation of Church and State, said April 18 that Simpson and her attorneys had not yet officially made the decision to appeal or ask for a re-hearing. According to the Richmond Times-Dispatch, Simpson has said she would welcome an appeal.

monthly gigs and online trends

Well, it is final. One of the Girls has two gigs coming up! Wer will be appearing on May 19th (Division location) and June 18th (Logan Square location). We are beginning to make what we hope are regular appearances at Smallbar. This is great news. Nonetheless, not all is well in OotG-land. Our banjo player has moved on. No animocity or some such, but we will be looking for a new player. Fliers are going to be posted at Old Town and other prime locations. If you know someone who might be interested, let me know. Visit our website or shoot me an email.

In other strangeness, I have been watching my traffic over the last months and have been trying to figure out what the trends are...what I post and who visits etc. What do you all think?

tripp and si

Here we are. This is a great picture of me and Si. Si is AKMA's son and a good friend of mine. He will be off to college in the fall. I will miss him greatly when he leaves. In the meantime I hope to see more of him than I have of late.

I have to say that I love this picture of us. We often laugh when we are together. It is nice to have some proof!

Peace, young Si-wan.

seabury family photo

Here are all the SWTS alum (present and future) from last night's ordination. AKMA has been downloading pictures from the event today into his Flickr account. Take a gander if you have the time. AKMA has listed everyone's name.

moody...quite moody

Feel free to ignore this post.

To be certain, this has much to do with my lack of sleep. I get by with six hours a night. It is not good for me. I am in a whiney mood this morning. To respond to this reality, I closed the comments on this post. I am venting. Feel free to ignore this at your leisure.

One of the things I am most proud of in myself is that I actually went to seminary. Yes, the vocational call is a great thing and all, but it is that I actually managed to go that amazes me. I can sit on my arse with the best of 'em. Indecision is a second home. I think I spent ten years trying to get up the energy and courage to actually apply again and go to seminary. I have to wade through anxieties and apathies (same coin, different day) to do something as enormous as a Master's degree. And now that I am done, I am trying to enjoy being a graduate, an ordained minister, a married guy and simply let the dust settle. But the dust does not want to settle.

I am working on being a trauma chaplain for the next two years. It is good work and Trish wants to stay in Chicago for a bit longer. Reconciler is of great importance and to make it fly, I will have to be a bi-vocational minister. Chaplaincy is a good fit for this. And yet, I whine. I don't want to file for yet one more set of certificiations. No more training, please! Oy! But that is the reality. And then there is my sickness. Yes, I am ill. I keep poking around these PhD programs. What the hell am I supposed to do with a PhD?!

Several people mentioned the PhD to me last night. I have expressed an interest more than once, so it is no great surprise. At the same time I still find it somewhat shocking that people bring it up. I really don't know if I want one. I try it on from time to time. This morning I surfed Union's site and the U of C Divinity School's site. GTU looks good.

There are just so many questions that orbit the whole PhD thing.
Is it useful?
Does it get me where I want to go?
Do I know where that is?
Does Jesus want me to get one?
Should any of the above matter?
Do I understan Jesus' desire?
Was the Rev Dr Mitchell's re-introduction a 2X4 or common kindness? Both?

How the hell am I supposed to do all the things I feel called to do? Maybe I do not understand calling at all. Maybe I am simply crazed and cannot sit still. It is a disease. Truely.

And I ask all this knowing that my thesis is incomplete in a white binder on my desk at home. I wrestle with my own apathy.

i should sleep more

This appears to be the general concensus. I was approached more than once last night about my tired appearance. Oy! And here I thought I was lookin' good. Ah well. The best laid plans of mice and baptists...you know the rest.

Jane is ordinated! Jane, Rebecca and Jeff are now more directly in crozier reach than they ever have been. Good for them! It was a wonderful service last night. I was thrilled to be there. The sentiments were generous. The cake was good. The bishop, Ed Little, is an All Around Nice Guy and Lee Mitchel introduced himself to me with "I know you. You are the liturgist from Saebury." I thought for a second that he was mistaking me for someone else. But, as I look nothing like Ruth Meyers, I thought I would probe a little more deeply. The good professor recalled a conversation or two we had. He was generous to remeber me. Susie suggested that it was some form of spiritual 2x4. I am uncertain. I have never been very good with carpentry. Nonetheless, it was flattering.

I am sitting in the office of the Retired UCC Pastor again. Trish has been "providing an adult presence" to the good pastor's daughter. You cannot call it babysitting when the kid is in high school. Teresa is quite cool. I rolled in a little after midnight last night to find Trish and Teresa watching "Band of Brothers" on the History Channel. There are so many things I like about this place, Teresa, the dog, internet, cable, a garage...the list goes on and on. We will spend most of the day here. If you would like to come over, give a call.

barth quote

Thanks to Robyn for this.

Theology is a peculiarly beautiful discipline. Indeed, we can confidently say that it is the most beautiful of all disciplines. To find academic study distasteful is the mark of the Philistine. It is an extreme form of Philistinism to find, or to be able to find, theology distasteful. The theologian who labors without joy is not a theologian at all. Sulky faces, morose thoughts and boring ways of speaking are intolerable in this field. [Karl Barth]

deacon

This evening Jane Ellen Schmoetzer, pastor of the Church of Jesus Christ, Reconciler and student at Seabury-Western Theological Seminary will be ordained a Deacon in the Episcopal Church. Larry and I will be driving the little red Jesus pod to South Bend for the service and festivities. I am very excited and quite happy for Jane.

Come, Holy Spirit!

obedience and music: ringo starr and jesus

Risen Christ, when we have the simple desire to welcome your love, little by little a flame is kindled in the depths of our being. Fueled by the Holy Spirit, this flame of love may be quite faint at first. The amazing thing is that it keeps burning. And when we realize that you love us, the trust of faith becomes our song. - Br. Roger of Taize

As I work through this idea of obedience I keep running into my own need to be musical. Perhaps "need" is the wrong word. Not to be too dramatic, but I cannot help myself. Music is simply something I have always done. To be obedient to Christ, I must be musical. And any musical skill or talent I posess must speak of Christ.

Furthermore, I believe that all humans are musical creatures. This is not an issue of skill or talent, but physiology and anthropology. Singing includes the breath (ruah) and the body, our creatureliness (adam). Our anthropology, if your will, is a musical one. This analogy does not end with singing either. In listening to music, our heart rates will quicken or slow depending upon our engagement with the music we hear. Those who think of themselves as "not musical" are often avid listeners and appreciators of music. Music must be heard! Perhaps we dance like King David. Those who play instruments breath with the phrasing of their plating. Yoyo Ma is the supreme example of breathing through his cello. Eric Clapton has often spoken of singing through his guitar. There are many pedagogical reasons why most small children learn to play the recorder as their first instrument. We breathe through it. Toddlers clap and sway. They may invent their own tunes...ya ya do tooo bla...You all know the tune. Sing along. Heh.

Obedience and music, as I understand it are irrevocably tied. Our personhood is manifested in it. I would go so far to say that our personhood is musical.

[Editor's Note: This is a longish post for me. I think there needs to be a part two to this. Let me know what you think and I will post some more later.]

As a Christian, I want to tie music and faith together. Perhaps others will not be so inclined, but as we discuss our anthropology (our createdness), understanding the place of music is essential. If anyone remembers the scene in that bad Ringo Starr movie, Caveman, they may recall the scene where the characters "invent" music. B-movie happiness aside, the interesting piece is the understanding that music has always been with us. We see it, as I mentioned previously, in our children. We see it in the grand variety of cultures throughout history. Ethnomusicology, a subset or hybrid of anthropology and music, speaks to this and studys the many musical forms that exist, some on paper, some on cd but most handed down from person to person. Humanity, it would seem, has always expressed itself musically.

In the Judeo-Christian tradition, this is most clear in the Psalms (Selah). Also one can find it in the various hymns recorded in the gospels and the epistles. Singing to or about God has always been an expression of human experience and theology. To give a little more ligh to that, here is a quote from A Song to Sing, A Life to Live:

Don has heard many church people confess that it is weasier for them to believe certain things when they sing them instead of just saying them, much less try to explain them. These mysteries are the essense of religious belief and life. Saliers & Saliers p. 18

At times song is the only voice, the only means of expression that we have. On the cross, at perhaps the darkest moment, Christ will quote a Psalm. He quotes a verse from a song to express his utter brokenness. "My God. My God. Why have you forsaken me?"

Singing the liturgy was a huge factor in my converion. Hymnody, spirituals and even praise and worship music have given voice to my own musing and have shaped my theology. The sung word: "Ave Maria"...Bogoroditzye devo"..."ubi caritas et amor"..."You may walk the barren desert"..."Amazing grace, how sweet the sound"...The total engagement of breath, voice...my body and mind in reciting the creeds on a pitch shape my faith. It seems that even language does not matter as the music itself fleshes out the meaning of the words for us in ways that a lexicon cannot. The quote from Brother Roger at the begining of this essay suggests this as well. Our lives are song. As we grow in faith, our faith becomes our song. It is bodied, can be disciplined, thoughtful, passionate, playful, or provocative. Through our spirits, our very own breath, the Spirit and Breath of God is revealed. This is what can happen in song. Our spirituality is disciplined.

Spirituality is not an idea in the brain but rather a disciplined bodily experience that grows deeper as practiced. If we are to grasp why and how true spirituality takes root in human beings, attend to the power of sound...Saliers & Saliers p. 21

The power of sound is irrefutable. Even the deaf have ways of "hearing" or feeling music. The life of Beethoven or the scene in Mr Holland's Opus are wonderful illustrations of how embodied sound is for us. Sound engages many of our senses. Musicians often speak of music having color. There are memories, reflections, emotions...all connected by and communicated through music.

I have often spoken of singing Evensong at Seabury. Song builds us up in the faith. If you read Cliff's blog, you may stumble across liturgies. Much of what is posted is sung by the choir, congregation, deacon or priest. Stand, pray and sing for two hours or more. You may find that your whole body resonates with the Spirit of God manifested in the Body of Christ.

And, somewhat lighter, if the Orthodox Church does not float your boat, attend a Reverend Al Green concert. You will be in church! Wow.

cont...with a little reflection on Romans 12:1-2

a baptist approach

Here is something that has been circulating for a while. I have never posted the link before, but since someone sent it to me today and the Maryland legislature is doing its thing, I thought I would share.

Follow the link above for the site. Follow the extended link for the text here if you are curious.

BAPTIST PASTOR TESTIFIES IN SOUTH CAROLINA

The Rev. Dr. Robert Shrum, Pastor, Oakland Baptist Church, Rock Hill SC Remarks Senate Judiciary Subcommittee Hearing On the Proposed Constitutional Amendment Barring Gay Marriage

Room 306, Senate Office Building (Gressette Building)
March 31, 2005 (1:30 p.m.)
By the Rev. Dr. Robert Dale Shrum

Greetings Chairman Ford, Senator Hawkins, Senator Cleary and Senator Hutto:

Good afternoon, and thank you for hearing me today. I am Bob Shrum, and I am a resident of Rock Hill where I have been the pastor of the Oakland Baptist Church for over 22 years. I have served two other Baptist congregations in Sumter and Pendleton. My pastoral service to Baptist churches in South Carolina has spanned more than 34 consecutive years. I grew up in Florence, and graduated from the University of South Carolina. I have deep roots here, and I love this state of ours. I am Sandlapper to the core. My remarks to you this afternoon grow, basically, out of two loves: my love of the Lord, Jesus Christ, and what I have learned through the years of him, and my love of this wonderful state where most of my almost 60 years have been spent. Please hear them in that light.

First of all, let me tell you that I speak for myself. I do not speak for the Oakland Baptist Church in Rock Hill or any other group or individual. If any of you are Baptist, you know that Baptists do not speak for each other. We're funny that way. We like our independence and resent it when others pretend to speak for us. Additionally, you should know that I am not gay, nor do I have---to my knowledge--- any family members who are gay. Quite simply, my remarks to you grow from conscience and deeply held convictions informed by Christian faith and over 40 years study of the Scriptures.

Let me tell you a story. When I was a little boy growing up in Florence, my Daddy was the manager of the Goodyear Tire Store on Irby St. He was good at what he did. Everybody admired him, and so did I. He was a Deacon in the First Baptist Church where we were members. One night---long after we had gone to bed---the telephone rang. It was from one of the men who worked back in his service department. He was in jail over in Marion and needed somebody to come get him out, so he called my Daddy. His crime? He was black and driving around after midnight, and it was in the 1950's. They arrested him on the pretense of suspicious behavior. In the wee hours of the morning my Daddy climbed into his '56 Ford with a T Bird engine and flew over to Marion. Not only did he get his employee out of jail that night, but the local sheriff got a real large piece of my Daddy's mind when he tried to laugh it all off and say "no harm done." I asked him about it the next night. I was 12 years old, and I wanted to know why he went to all the trouble. His explanation, "Bobby, it just wasn't right." I learned a lesson from my Daddy that night that I carry into this room today: IT'S JUST PLAIN NOT RIGHT TO TREAT FOLKS LIKE THEY DON'T COUNT---LIKE THEY'RE NOT REAL PEOPLE.

But there's something else I bring into this room today. I have to believe it's a big part of what my Daddy took to that jail in Marion that night. It's the life, influence and example of Jesus, himself. Now, if you're not a Christian, maybe that's not all that important to you. But I am a Christian, and it's real important to me, so I have to speak out of what, in my heart, is foundational. And, for me, it's Jesus. It's not Leviticus. It's not even Paul because sometimes Paul sends mixed signals. It's not the Pope. It's not denominational headquarters. It's not the religious figures who speak so loudly and authoritatively so as to drown out all those who would differ. I look to Jesus when I am puzzled and don't have all the answers like I wish I had. I had a teacher in seminary. Old Testament teacher. Clyde Francisco was his name. Dr. Francisco used to tell us, "Now boys, remember this: whenever you get stumped trying to understand the meaning of something in the Bible, just let Jesus be your interpreter. Let the spirit of Christ be your guide, and you won't go wrong."

And that's what I try to do. And, to tell the truth, it's not always so easy. It's not easy because lots of times I would rather let my prejudices guide me. After all, I've lived long enough to know what's right and what's wrong, and I'd like to think that most of the time I'm right, and those who don't agree with me are wrong. That's why I have to try real hard to let the spirit of Christ be my guide. And whenever I've been successful at pulling that off, I never go wrong. And I commend that to you today if you're in a quandary about what to do with this big, big question you're dealing with. If you approach it with the spirit of Christ, you won't go wrong.

So, what does the spirit of Christ look like? What does it smell like? What does it sound like? It's a bunch of blue collar fishermen. It's a despised tax collector. It's a colony of lepers. It's a hated Roman soldier with a sick son. It's hungry people being fed. It's the children who they tried to keep quiet and out of sight. It's a woman married five times that he made feel worthy. It's another woman caught in adultery that the religious establishment wanted to execute, but he set her free. It's a Samaritan man who the church people hated, but Jesus made him a hero. It was a little old lady so poor that she only had a few pennies for the offering plate, and Jesus held her up as an example for the ages. It was a woman of the streets who became one of his best friends. It was a thief on a cross that he took home with him. You see, the religious experts of his time called him a drunk and a glutton because he went to parties with them, and they despised him because he hung out
with the folks who were on the margins of respectable society---the disenfranchised ones---the ones they called the dregs of society. And they killed him for it. BUT THAT WAS HIS SPIRIT. And it was a spirit that ultimately would not, could not go wrong. Last Sunday---Easter---amidst all our "Hallelujahs, He is risen" we reminded ourselves that it is that kind of spirit that will always, always prevail. Easter tells us that God will not allow the spirit of Christ to be defeated. We may try to kill it with our hateful attitudes, but at the end of the day, it will be our hateful attitudes toward "the least of these" that will go down to defeat.

Can't we see it? Jesus refused to marginalize any segment of society. They were all God's children and therefore brothers and sisters to each other. And he only reserved his harshest word for the religious/ political establishment which had become quite adept at fixing their constitutions to separate the decent folk from the different folk. He said they were like tombstones---pretty and white on the outside, but dead and empty on the inside.

So, I appeal to you today. Let the Spirit of Christ guide you even if you are not a Christian. You won't go wrong if you do. Do not use the Constitution of our beloved state to marginalize a segment of our citizenry. Do not listen to the fear-mongers. They have always been among us throughout our history trying to scare us with their doomsday scenarios, trying to marginalize one segment of society and then another. And, they have always been proven wrong at the end of the day. Trust the spirit of Christ. Trust Easter. Or as my Daddy might have said, "IT'S JUST PLAIN NOT RIGHT TO TREAT FOLKS LIKE THEY DON'T COUNT."

Thank you for your time.

maryland

Connecticut, Maryland legislators pass domestic-partner bills

By Robert Marus

WASHINGTON (ABP) -- Legislators in Connecticut and Maryland have passed bills providing state protection for relationships between domestic partners, including same-sex relationships.

On April 6, the Connecticut Senate voted 27-9 for a bill that would create civil unions -- legal arrangements that provide many of the same benefits and responsibilities as marriage -- for same-sex couples.

And late on April 11, the Maryland House gave approval to a bill creating a state domestic-partnership registry that includes gay couples. The registry would provide some, but not all, of the benefits of civil unions. Maryland senators had already approved the bill.

Democrats control the legislatures in both states.

The Connecticut vote came only a day after Kansas voters, by a similar margin, approved a state constitutional amendment banning same-sex marriage. They joined 13 other states that passed similar amendments to their state charters last year.

Local news reports said observers expected the Connecticut House of
Representatives to approve the measure as early as April 13, although it had not yet passed by press time for this story.

Both states have Republican governors who have expressed support for gay rights in the past, and many observers expect them to sign the respective bills. However, neither Connecticut Gov. Jodi Rell nor Maryland Gov. Robert Ehrlich has yet explicitly indicated they would add their signature.

If Rell does sign the bill, Connecticut would become the first state in the union in which legislators approved civil unions or same-sex
marriages without pressure from judicial decisions. Rulings by the highest courts in Massachusetts and Vermont in recent years have forced legislators in those states to create such arrangements for same-sex couples.

difficult thinking

Here is something to think about:

Research suggests that the majority of families want to be present while resuscitative measures are being performed on their loved ones. Multiple studies have reported families believe they benefit by being present, citing decreased anxiety, hopelessness, wondering, helplessness, and having an increased understanding of the seriousness of the illness or trauma. Family members who were present felt they could provide comfort to their dying loved one and that their loved one knew they were present and felt comforted. Families also felt their presence facilitated their own grieving, and that their adjustment to the loss of a loved one was made easier.

When asked if families would make the same choice, nearly all stated they would participate in the resuscitation process again. Families believed they became part of the healthcare team, they functioned as the patient’s advocate, and that their presence had a positive impact on the patient. Families also believed their presence made the healthcare team view the patient as a person, which made them more accountable for their actions. - Implementing a Family Presence Protocol Option York, Nancy; RN, MSN Lippincott Williams & Wilkins, Jan 1, 2004

I have had experiences that support this. And, obviously, the religious convictions of the family could play a large part in this decision. I have experienced Pentacostals wanting to come in and lay on hands...and as long as only one person comes back and not the whole family, I will "allow" it. Our ER bays are smallish, and ten more people in there is impossible. So, typically only two family members are allowed back at a time. In the case of an ongoing recuscitation, there can be ten medical staff people in the room with the patient. Adding very emotional family into the mix is disruptive and can even be dangerous. But sometimes you run into a family where it becomes apparent that allowing them in will bring them healing...even if their loved one dies.

Even when the outcome is death, a family might feel that their loved one and they have received the best care possible. It is a tremendous ministry to offer and witness.

What do you think? Would you want to be in the room?

funny

This is from the Christian Century.

wednesday already?!

Hey.

Blogging regularly is hard with no internet at home.

So many people claim to believe in the Resurrection, and yet it means so little to them. It has no effect in their lives. It is not enough to celebrate Easter and say “Christ is risen!” Indeed, it is useless to proclaim it at all, unless at the same time we can say that we too have risen.(link)

- C. F. Blumhardt

I have been pondering these things recently. The thinking appeared in my sermon. Larry has been reflecting as well. Interesting stuff.

Today I will be sitting in the library and working on my grant proposal for next year's fellowship. There is much work to be done. For your reading, take a gander at these sermons from last Sunday's lectionary readings.

The Sacristan
Reverend Ref - You'll need to scroll down.

I have been reading through the Saliers' book of late. I want to post something about music and obedience, but that will have to wait, I think. It has to do with this quote:

Spirituality is not an idea in the brain but rather a disciplined bodily experience that grows deeper as practiced. If we are to grasp why and how true spirituality takes root in human beings, attend to the power of sound...

I'll see y'all around.

Holy Spirit, however powerless we may be, enable us to
bring peace where there are oppositions and violence,
and to make a reflection of God’s compassion visible
through our lives. Yes, enable us to love and to express
it by the lives we lead. - Bro. Roger of Taize

alleluia! something happened! a sermon for the third sunday of easter

Acts 2:14a, 36-41
Psalm 116: 1-4, 12-19
1 Peter 1:17-23
Luke 24:13-35

I was in college when I started to wonder what all of the hubbub around Easter was all about. To some, this may seem a little late in the game to be asking such questions. I was a Junior in college. I was well into my religion major. I was participating in ministry efforts with the Baptist Student Union. I thought of myself as a Christian. I claimed the identity. Yet, I would deny Easter.

I simply did not believe that it made sense. I wanted it to make sense. There was one problem, but that’s another sermon. You have to understand that I was not some rationalist or even a skeptical empiricist. Christmas made sense to me; the Incarnation of God in a manger resonated with my soul in a way that Easter never did. The cross made sense. However, I could never buy into the Resurrection.

“So unnecessary!”
“Superfluous!”
“Cruel!”

I simply could not live with the possibility that Easter was integral to the faith. I would rail against it in my classes and with the few in the Baptist Student Union who would put up with me. I was sad and outraged. Somehow, all of my struggles as a young man were wrapped up in my denial of Easter.

One day, I brought all of my struggles to the college chaplain. In retrospect, I am sure that he heard nothing new from me. But, for me it was momentous. I was going to speak to the Reverend Doctor David Burhans, Southern Baptist pastor and university chaplain. I expected rejection and I was foolish to do so. Dr. Burhans had this resonant voice with a thick southern accent. He would speak slowly and carefully. The generous inflections that his accent brought seemed to deepen meaning in every word. And “generosity” is the only word that describes what he shared with me.

Today we find our friends, the two disciples walking along the Emmaus road. It is the third day. Their teacher and guide is dead. Their dreams have been destroyed; their hopes dashed. All they can do is walk. They are sad.

I have often wondered what they may have said to one another as they walked. Perhaps they spoke of nothing. Perhaps the mused about the lives that they would return to now that the ministry of Jesus had come to an end. I imagine that they grief and outrage weighed them down. I imagine that they might have been trapped in their heads trying to figure out what went wrong, what they could have done differently. Perhaps different words or sayings of Jesus’ echoed in their memories. “Stay with me.” “Remain with me.” “Tell no one.” “Go two by two.” “You have been made clean.” Grief has a way of taking over. Loss almost has a taste to it.

Then there appeared a stranger. The two spoke to him of Jesus and the strange stories about a resurrection. And they shared their disbelief. He rebuked them and spoke to them of prophesy and promises made and promises kept. Still, in their grief they were blind. Their eyes did not see.
As he seemed to move on ahead of them, the two begged him to stop and sup with them. “Stay with us,” they said.

vs. 29-31 So he went in to stay with them. When he was at table with them, he took bread, blessed and broke it, and gave it to them. Then their eyes were opened, and they recognized him; and he vanished from their sight.

Was it the interpretation? Yes…and no. Though their hearts burned, it was not until Christ revealed himself in action that he was recognized. Only in retrospect did they see him in the scriptures. But in intimacy, in a shared meal and a shared journey was he revealed.

All that he had ever asked of them that they could not do, to stay up and pray and eat and wait, he had done for them once again. In their grief and in their brokenness he stayed with them and fed them. This is how the risen Lord appears to the broken, the grieving, and the outraged.

Dr Burhans and I did not speak long. He listened as I shared my attitudes about Easter. I remember that when I finished speaking, I braced myself for the debate of a lifetime. He smiled, leaned across his desk and said,

“You know, Tripp, I could debate with you, but I doubt that would be of much help. But this is what I will say: Something happened on the third day. You have to sit with that. Challenging it is not doing you any good. You must learn to sit with it at the very least. Something happened.”

True enough. I sat there stunned. For me in that moment something did happen. Something was revealed. Something happened for the two followers of Christ. Jesus stayed. Jesus prayed. He broke bread. He returned from the dead and fulfilled the promises he made. Dr Burhans taught the lesson of the resurrection to me. It was not a question of being convinced of the evidence. It was not the issue of having just the right bibliographic citation, coursework, or training. No, I was not convinced. I have never been convinced.

I was converted.

Through the gentle urgings of Dr. Burhans, God walked with me. God stayed with me and I slowly began to listen to the story and my heart began to burn.

I love the LORD because he heard my voice and my supplications. Because he inclined his ear to me, therefore I will call on him as long as I live. The snares of death encompassed me; the pangs of Sheol laid hold on me; I suffered distress and anguish. Then I called on the LORD: “O LORD, I pray, save my life!” Gracious is the LORD, and righteous; our God is merciful. The LORD protects the simple; when I was brought low, he saved me.

sermon stuff...

I am preaching at Reconciler tomorrow. I am acutely aware that 99.99% of my awareness is centered in on the hospital these days. I need to reduce that a bit, I realise, it leads to a few problems. One of them is that all of the sermon illustrations I seem to have are about traumatic moments in the ER. This is good every so often, but if it is all you have, you can exhaust your congregation. "The ER again?!"

So, I have been trying to allow my mind to drift off in other directions. I Want Jesus to Walk With Me has been playing in my head. This journey to Emmaus as told in Luke 24:13-35 is a pretty well known tale. I was thinking of avoiding it and preaching on the other readings until I realized that even with all the walking about I do in the name of Jesus each day of the week I forget that Jesus is walking with me...or that it matters that Jesus walks with us at all. There are different kinds of journeys as well...Peter's journey from denial ("I do not know the man.") to proclamation ("Men of Judea and all who live in Jerusalem, let this be known to you, and listen to what I say.") is one worth our attention. This is perhaps how the resurrection transforms us. There is the Emmaus walk itself as well. Jesus is there and the prototypical Peter's Denial becomes the truth of the moment...until Jesus is revealed in the breaking of the bread.

Until Jesus is revealed in the breaking of the bread. Yeah. I am a good Baptist.

So, I will preach to myself and hope that the Spirit is moving for my brothers and sisters as well.

obedience and the university of chicago

Yesterday I was in attendance for a very interesting symposium on brokeness and bodies at the University of Chicago Shcool of Divinity. Several things came up for me that center in on vocation and obedience. For me, obedience and a sense of call have always been joined. I assume this is true for most. I have always wrestled with obedience in this way. "What do you want from me, God?" That is the question.

I have not always been willing to follow the urgings of the Spirit. Sometimes God has called in the night. "Come. Follow me." All I can seem to do is sit back and say "Golly. Sounds like God. Looks like God. Must be God. So, now what?" Action has never been the natural offspring of discernment for me. Perhaps I simply have not been given the gift of discernment. That is possible. The level of trust I must have of God's own voice in the midst of all the voices in my head is decidedly low. I don't always know what voice is God's. The University of Chicago is a great case in point.

I always have the same experience when I go there. My hear beats a little faster. I am excited to be there. I am a sucker for collegiate gothic architecture. Grey stone buildings enshrouded with ivy...intellectual conversation. Lovely.

After I get through all of my "surrounded by smart people" insecurities, I always enjoy myself. Yesterday was no exception. I can play with the thinkers. I chat, challenge and wonder along with. I used to think I should go there for an MDiv. Clearly, that did not happen. The Div School has deep Baptist roots. Sometimes I think that I should seek out the possibilities of getting a PhD there. Yesterday I sat and prayed. I wondered aloud. I even met and spoke with the Dean who happened to be at the symposium. He's a nice man. I got up the courage to mention that I had an interest in in coming. He smiled politely. I am sure he hears that a lot. There is no shortage of students at the Div School.

I do have an interest in coming. As I was excitedly sharing the day with trish she laughed and said "Why don't you just go there for your PhD?" It seems so clear to her. It has seemed clear to others throughout the years. But I balk. Insecurities arise. Fear. Trembling. Trish would be happy to play in Chicago for another six years. I would happily study Reformation History/Theology at the Div School.

Obedience comes to the fore. I may want me to be at the UofC. Maybe God does too. So far, I have not been able to discern a call on my own and have been unable to be obedient to the leadings of those who surround me.

This is a type of disobedient. My will is still greater than God's in my life. "I will decide where God is to lead me. Not you." Where does the community come in? I don't know. I spoke to Susie about all this as well. Perhaps the fantasy is to teach there. I cannot say.

If I follow my desires, then I am scattered. I desire much. I am greedy for much. Trauma work, music, congregational service, PhD, teacher...Lordy, where does it end this greed of mine? Where is God in this? Who do I obey?

I am not sure I know who to obey...or whom I am already disobeying.

Obedience and call...it is not a symple equation of desire and response. And yet..."Come. Follow me." sounds so very simple.

satreday pancakes

I am at the hospital for a double shift...sixteen hours. Oy.

But I need some help. Can anyone send pancakes to the SICU? We need pancakes stat.

obedience and urban monasticism

I know that I have written about my time at Richmond Hill several times, but I want to take a different spin on it today.

One of the things I learned at Richmond Hill was obedience. In this case it was obedience to an abbot (of a kind) and a community.

In order to become a member at Richmond Hill, I had to go through a discernment process. Members of the committee included two resident members of the community and one board member, in this case a Baptist minister. It was confusing for me at first. I did not know what to expect. Never before had I needed to convince or confer with anyone about any decision in my life. Sure, parents were always involved somewhere, but no one else. It was quite the change. The discussions and conversations were always spiritual, sometimes personal and even practical. "How will you support yourself while you live here?" "What do you bring to the community?" "I have two yound boys that live with me. How are you with kids?"

The meetings were spread over four months. I am told that I somehow sped up the process. To this day, I am not certain how I managed that trick. Nonetheless, it felt like an eternity to me. I don't recall the meeting we had when it was decided that I was called to participate in the ministry and life of Richmond Hill. What I remember is lying when I said I understood the vows I was to take.

"Conversatio" (conversation): Living one's life as if it were a conversation with God, in a commitment to personal spiritual disciplines.
"Stabilitas" (stability): Living one's life in, of, and for metropolitan Richmond, in a commitment to this place as the locus of one's fundamental duty to be a part of the bringing in of the reign of God.

Obedience: Living one's life in response to God's will, in a commitment to the mission of the community.

Hospitality: Living one's life in service of others, in a commitment to welcome guests in love and a spirit of prayer.
Healing: Living one's life in hope for wholeness, in a commitment to inner healing and healing of the larger community of metropolitan Richmond.
Prayer: Living one's life in the presence of God, in a commitment to private, corporate, and intercessory prayer for metropolitan Richmond.
Racial reconciliation: Living one's life in attention to the particular wounds of race in metropolitan Richmond, in a commitment to racial reconciliation.
Community: Living one's life as life together, in a commitment to shared mission and a common life.
"Laborare et orare" (to work and to pray): Living one's life in a rhythm of work, prayer, and restoration, in a commitment to a thoughtful life-style.
Simplicity: Living one's life without excess, in a commitment to a modest use of resources that resists greed and consumerism.
Humility: Living one's life in perspective, in a commitment to assess and honor one's own gifts and those of others.
Ecumenism: Living one's life in fidelity to Jesus Christ, in a commitment to honor all expressions of Christian faith and in openness to other religions and faiths.
Christian social transformation: Living one's life for others, in a commitment to join spiritual practices with social justice in metropolitan Richmond.

The lie was not about an intelectual understanding. I had studied about monasticism, but I had never lived it. I had never lived obedience or justice. Much of it was attractive to me, but understanding, well, that is a different thing.

I thought of obedience as this awful thing, an involuntary thing, perhaps at best it was a systemic response to abuse or tyranny. I would gain understanding over the years as I lived into the rhythm of prayer (with varying degrees of success) and participating in the ministry of the retreat center. I cannot tell you how many Saturdays were spent cooking for the 20-80 people who might come to spend the weekend. There would be conversations with the volunteers and retreatants. I was obedient to their needs and to the ministry of the place. I was obedient when I was asked to sing. I was obedient when asked to cook. I was obedient when asked to pray. And I was obedient when I was accused of stealing.

Yes, even to the acusation I was obedient. Obedience is tied directly to truth-telling. One can become obedient to a lie, but if one is within a discerning community where trust has been established, then true obedience can be spelling out the truth to your accuser...even when it is within the same community. Trust fluctuates. It can be broken and restored. There are growing pains. I was innocent, and was believed when I confronted the accusation, when I was willing to be obedient and sit and listen to the accusation.

I sat in the garden with the abbot and faced the charges. He wept with me as I defended myself. He looked in my eyes as he said, "I believe you." And he let me go when I needed to storm away enraged. We were obedient to one another, to our relationship and the shared vows. We were even obedient to the named rift between us.

Not a burden we bear, not a sorrow we share,
But our toil He doth richly repay;
Not a grief or a loss, not a frown or a cross,
But is blessed if we trust and obey.

After a time, trust was restored. Our shared obedience to a life of prayer, to our shared work served to restore this trust. It is this life together that restored trust...that gave context to our obedience. The naming, the discipline...being obedient is far more than always saying "yes" to someone who sits above you in a heirarchy. The heirchy must be obedient to a rule, regula, a vision. If all are obedient, the obedience is not subserviance to tyranny. It is not submission to an oppressor. It is submission to the love of God which allows for trust and growth and the promise of freedom.

morning at the hospital

Here I am. Sitting.

I am trying to find out who this guy is. Fingerprints anyone? I will be leaving soon for a meeting with the Park Ridge Fire Dept. We are going to discuss the disaster/terrorist plans here in Park Ridge. Mostly I will sit and listen and learn. It should be very cool.

in the news:

Saul Bellow passed away.
Can we really know? Probably not, but speculation points to a Nigerian for the next pope.

Cardinal Francis Arinze of Nigeria, one of the top contenders to become pope next week, is best known for his interfaith experience with Muslims and his meteoric rise from a poor African village to the halls of the Vatican.

He is, um, outsopoken on many issues...perhaps too much so ('If people are concerned about overpopulation, maybe they should volunteer themselves to be eliminated rather than the helpless innocent,'). What I find promising is his Interreligious bent.

From 1984 to 2002, the cardinal oversaw the Vatican's Pontifical Council for Interreligious Dialogue, which reaches out to non-Christians.
"His writing the book shows a certain world awareness that might be lacking in other cardinals," Mr. Murphy said. "He's met with a variety of world religious leaders and his openness to dialogue is extremely important."

And, finally, here is an interesting article from the Baptist press folk: Alliance between evangelicals, Catholics among legacies of John Paul II's papacy (see: extended link)

By Rob Marus

WASHINGTON (ABP) -- The dynamic bishop from Krakow who became one of the 20th century's most towering figures departed earthly life April 2, but his legacy -- including the special esteem in which many American evangelical Protestants held him -- lives on.

Perhaps the most prominent evidence of Pope John Paul II's unique place in the hearts of evangelicals came from America's most prominent evangelical, President Bush. "The Catholic Church has lost its shepherd, the world has lost a champion of human freedom, and a good and faithful servant of God has been called home," Bush said in a statement he issued shortly after Vatican officials announced the pontiff's death.

Bush has frequently made references to the "culture of life," a phrase coined by John Paul II in his many writings on life-ethics issues. Bush has used the phrase mainly to discuss abortion rights, stem-cell research and euthanasia. He cited the term repeatedly in discussing the recent dispute over Terri Schiavo, the incapacitated Florida woman who died March 31.

Indeed, many prominent evangelicals cited the pope's commitment to a
pro-life ethic in reflections on his legacy.

"His passion brought leadership on many cultural issues, including
traditional marriage and the protection of unborn children. He also took a strong stance against embryonic stem-cell research and human cloning," said Tony Perkins, president of the conservative Family Research Council, in a statement on John Paul II's death. "The pope must be recognized for his prolific writings, his gift for language, and his outspoken affirmation of life that we enjoy from our Creator, from conception to natural death."

Baptist evangelist Billy Graham called the pope "unquestionably the most influential voice for morality and peace in the world during the last 100 years. ... [H]e was respected by men and women from every
conceivable background across the world. He was truly one of those rare individuals whose legacy will endure long after he has gone."

Such effusive praise for a pope stands in stark contrast to the views
expressed by evangelicals toward Catholicism -- and the papacy in
particular -- in the years prior to John Paul II's election in 1978. For example, many conservative and fundamentalist Protestants led opposition to the election of President John F. Kennedy in 1960 because of Kennedy's Catholicism.

According to experts on the Catholic tradition, John Paul II's views on life-ethics issues, his visibility and his attempts to reach across religious barriers all contributed to the new attitudes toward him.

"I think this pope particularly had a clear concern to join in dialogue with people of other faiths, and we see that" in his actions, such as visiting synagogues and mosques and meeting with religious leaders wherever he went, said Joe Favazza, an ex-Catholic priest and professor of religious studies at Rhodes College in Memphis, Tenn.

Favazza also cited the pontiff's legendary charisma in explaining his
good relations with many evangelical leaders.

"He could look you right in the eye, and he could be very personal with you, and you had to deal with this presence. And I think that's exactly what happened with a lot of the evangelical leaders," he said. "I think he was a man of great integrity, a man who both 'talked the talk' and 'walked the walk.' And I think that had a great effect on a lot of people who believed the Catholic Church prior to 1978 had less faith than rituals."

Paige Patterson, president of Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary, reflected on the first of his two meetings with the pope. "While it would be difficult to imagine two people talking together with a theological divide as wide as the ocean and still finding much in common, this is exactly what transpired," he said in an April 2 news release.

Frank Ruff, a Catholic priest in Kentucky who has served two stints as the U.S. Conference of Catholic Bishops' official liaison to the
Southern Baptist Convention, said the pope's very personal appeal won
over many conservative skeptics.

"When [evangelicals] saw him, they saw somebody that they understood to be a holy man," said Ruff, who pastors two small-town Catholic parishes in Kentucky. "It's hard for many evangelicals to say Catholics can be saved. But when they saw him, they saw somebody who was saved. They could say, 'There's a man who's living the gospel, who's in communication with God.'"

Nonetheless, both Ruff and Favazza noted, for all of evangelicals'
embracing of John Paul II and his rhetoric on abortion and euthanasia, the pope had a more strenuous standard in mind when he talked about the "culture of life."

"I think Bush and others in some ways tried to position themselves as
friends of the pope or sympathetic to the pope by pushing these buttons, but John Paul's vision of the 'culture of life' extended beyond abortion to capital punishment, and from individual morality to corporate morality," Favazza said.

Ruff elaborated: "You know, if your economic system is such that the
poor don't have access to health insurance and good health care, that's not a 'culture of life,' that's a culture of death."

In another example of how John Paul II's view of the "culture of life" conflicted with other evangelical views, the pope expressed strong disagreement over the Iraq war in his last visit with Bush. And many evangelicals and other conservatives have also differed with the pope's teachings on capital punishment, contraception and economic issues.

Commentators have also praised John Paul II for his role in helping
bring an end to communist rule in Eastern Europe. In particular, they laud the pontiff for providing momentum to the "Solidarity" movement
that ultimately brought an end to Soviet domination over his native
Poland in the early 1980s.

Baptist World Alliance General Secretary Denton Lotz, himself heavily
involved in the struggle against Soviet oppression in Eastern Europe,
praised John Paul's role. "His strong defense of democracy and the
Solidarity movement strengthened not only the Polish people in their
resolve against the dictatorship of Marxist ideology, but gave courage to all Eastern Europeans in their struggle and eventual defeat of communism," Lotz said in an April 4 statement.

Al Mohler, Southern Baptist Theological Seminary president, agreed.
"Evangelical Christians should honor the courage of this man and his
historic role in bringing communist tyranny to an end -- at least within the Soviet Union and in Eastern Europe," he wrote, in an April 4 column published by the Southern Baptist Convention's press service.

However, John Paul II in later years also strongly criticized the
excesses of unrestrained capitalism. More moderate evangelical leaders have praised John Paul II for his commitment to the ppor. "His words and his actions -- indeed, his very life -- exemplified the authority of religion to resist captivity to politics and to transcend the interests of narrow nationalism in order to build a global community in which people live with ... freedom from
intolerance, prejudice and poverty," said Welton Gaddy, a Baptist
minister who is president of the Interfaith Alliance, in a statement
released April 4.

Roy Medley, general secretary of the American Baptist Churches, called the pontiff "a leading voice for the poor and disenfranchised throughout the world," according to the American Baptist News Service.

One issue on which evangelicals and the pope were in close agreement was in the area of religious liberty. John Paul II's advocacy on the issue included personal confrontations with some of the world's most
oppressive dictators.

Both Favazza and Ruff noted that the pontiff was one of the leading
proponents for the strong statement on religious liberty adopted by the Second Vatican Council in 1962-63. Then, during his papacy, Favazza said, he "took the next step with that and said, first of all, we're going to challenge those leaders who need to be challenged [for violations of their people's religious freedom] and also admit there are times that the Catholic Church itself has transgressed this."

For example, John Paul II famously apologized for the Crusades and
issued a statement stating that the Catholic Church did not place any
blame on the Jewish people for Christ's death.

"He advanced, I guess, the tradition on religious liberty that was well articulated in the Second Vatican Council," Favazza said.

Ruff said that religious freedom was one area in which Catholics such as John Paul II had learned from evangelicals, and especially Baptists.

"We're very grateful to the evangelical insistence on it in our country and the benefits that we received from it, and our theologians learned from that and reflected on it," he said. "But that's very much the result of some good Baptist work at the time of the writing of the Constitution."

On his trips to the United States, John Paul II praised the nation's
founding documents for recognizing human dignity by guaranteeing rights and freedoms.

Despite all the areas of agreement, some conservative evangelicals did note that fundamental differences between Protestants and Catholics remain, particularly over the role of the papacy itself.

"In the end, evangelicals should be thankful for the personal virtues
Pope John Paul II demonstrated, and for his advocacy on behalf of life, liberty and human dignity. Yet we cannot ignore the institution of the papacy itself, nor the complex of doctrines, truth claims and false doctrines that John Paul II taught, defended and promulgated," Mohler wrote, singling out the pope's teachings on salvation and his devotion to particular Catholic doctrines about Mary, the mother of Jesus, whom the pope labeled "co-redemptrix" with Christ.

But Favazza said that fact in itself was significant -- that John Paul II could maintain strict devotion to distinctive Catholic positions while still reaching out to many who had previously been very alienated from the papacy.

"As much as he was concerned with dialogue and relations with other
denominations, he was still very clear about the boundaries of the
Catholic faith," Favazza said. "So, he will be remembered for many
things, but compromise will not be one of them."

Very interesting.

musings before lunch

I have been working through some of that stuff on obedience that I made mention of yesterday. I want to talk about monasticism and obedience and some of my experience orbiting around monastic communities. That will come. I am slowly plugging through the post.

This past sunday at Reconciler was lovely. Though we still struggle to have adequate electricity and the like, we do get help (with apologies) from Ron and Phil. This is a good thing. I find that the lack of electricity is a distraction for me. I am working on that. Pray for me.

Jane is back! She preached. It is lovely to have her back around. Larry was not feeling well, so we were not totally up to speed, but it was a good service.

We also had a visitor this Sunday. Nanette Sawyer from Wicker Park Grace made an appearance. She too is a pastor of a church plant. The three of us from Reconciler will be meeting with her over tea/coffee this Thursday. I am hopeful that there could be a supportive relationship there. I'll let you know how it goes.

Okay, lunch calls. Pax!

in the news

The church's constant teaching on the right to private property and ownership of the means of production differs radically from the collectivism proclaimed by Marxism, but also from the capitalism practiced by liberalism and the political systems inspired by it. In the latter case the difference consists in the way the right to ownership and property is understood. Christian tradition never upheld this right as absolute and untouchable. It has always understood it as subordinated to the fact that the goods of this world are meant for all. - Pope John Paul II

Here is a kind and appreciative Op/Ed piece about the Pope.
Here is a scathing Op/Ed piece about the Pope.
Here is a good post on thinking with the Pope.
Here is an article about brain injuries and what we may or may not know.
And, finally, here is an article about podcasting.

Y'all enjoy.

obedience

I was speaking with my friend and fellow Reconciler, Kate, yesterday evening about this hymn. It has one of those tunes that stays with you. It's catchy. You have to give it that much. I have been thinking about our conversation and it has prompted me to post about obedience this week...maybe not all week, but I think there will be a couple of days worth of entries. Be ye warned.

Trust and Obey

When we walk with the Lord in the light of His Word,
What a glory He sheds on our way!
While we do His good will, He abides with us still,
And with all who will trust and obey.

Refrain

Trust and obey, for there’s no other way
To be happy in Jesus, but to trust and obey.

Not a shadow can rise, not a cloud in the skies,
But His smile quickly drives it away;
Not a doubt or a fear, not a sigh or a tear,
Can abide while we trust and obey.

Refrain

Not a burden we bear, not a sorrow we share,
But our toil He doth richly repay;
Not a grief or a loss, not a frown or a cross,
But is blessed if we trust and obey.

Refrain

But we never can prove the delights of His love
Until all on the altar we lay;
For the favor He shows, for the joy He bestows,
Are for them who will trust and obey.

Refrain

Then in fellowship sweet we will sit at His feet.
Or we’ll walk by His side in the way.
What He says we will do, where He sends we will go;
Never fear, only trust and obey.

Refrain