conjectural navel gazing; jesus in lint form

'scopes

Rob just makes me laugh. He just does.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Through a friend of a friend of a friend in the publishing business, I've caught wind of a mysterious manuscript that may soon be turned into a book. It's called *I'm the Boss of My Underpants.* My source was maddeningly vague about the subject matter, but it sounds like something I'd love you to get your hands on as soon as possible. In the coming weeks, you'll need to get crystal clear about who exactly *is* the boss of your underpants. You should also devote a lot of thought to defining the rules that will govern your underpants in the future, including the important issues of where and when and with whom you'll take them off.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): There are no longer enough Catholic priests in North America to fulfill all the requests for divine intervention that are received from parishioners. The requests are therefore outsourced to churches in India, where up-and-coming young clergy pray over them at $5 a pop. It's too bad the powers-that-be apparently don't know about me and my team of Prayer Warriors, because we perform the same service absolutely free. To demonstrate our effectiveness, we plan to unleash a series of powerful prayers on your behalf. Specifically, we will beseech God to bless you in the coming weeks with cathartic pleasures that will permanently expand your capacity for happiness.

Trish is the Taurus. She will be off Shakespearing it again this evening. I will be here working on my ordination essays. Yay? I will post the results of my muddled musings and let you know how it all goes. In the extended, you can read through the questions if you wish.

1.Please share with us a concise statement of your faith.

2.What philosophical and theological systems underlie the cognitive side of your faith?

3.What is your understanding of the Trinity? How is it relevant to our faith today?

4.What is the nature and mission of the local church?

5.How do you understand the authority of the Bible? In what ways does the Bible function in your life?

6.How do you understand prayer in terms of your personal life and the corporate life of the church?

7.Discuss what you believe the task of the minister to be. How do you see yourself in relationship to various forms of ministry? What are your career goals?

8.As you assess your personal capacities for ministry at this time, what do you consider your strongest points and what do you feel to be the aspects most needing development?

9.What does ordination mean to you? Why have you elected to be ordained to the Gospel ministry or have your ordination recognized in the ABCUSA? What experiences led you to make this choice?

10.How do you see the ABCUSA in relation to the Church universal? What is our understanding of ABC polity and organization?

11.Given the historic Baptist principle of separation of church and state, how do you see the duty of the church toward society?

Posted by tripp at August 18, 2004 04:33 PM