conjectural navel gazing; jesus in lint form

Don't be doggin' my ice cream. And you can't go without me!!!

Trish

Doggin your what? Heh.

And I figured we would go after your burn your calories for the day.

I'm with you. You should definately try the fudge brownie as a shake. It's incredible. And nothing else compares.

Right on!

Thou heretic! Convene a council! Implore the Pope! Never have I heard such shenanigans and goings on, not even from an Anglobaptist. I shan't share the true flavor, however, as it would be inappropriate prior to your recantation and burning. Until then, I'm off to find some marachino cherries for my sundae...

Have at thee, idolater! Tis but the simple truth of the chocolate fudge brownie that is the revealed Creame! I implore you to harken to the words of the blessed Creameries of antiquity! "Make not thy vanilla plain, as it is an afront to the generosity of Spirit. Put chunks of brownie goodness in thy chocolate ice creame, for this edifies the soul and brings peace to the earth." (Benegarious 22:17)

Call thou me an idolater, thou bloody minded schismatical chocolateer??! Right, thou shalt be burned though thy tender parts cry out! Hear now the words of our blessed father: 'Shun thou the chunks of brown, the acid wastes of the cocoa plant, for they but defile thy lips and taint thy tongue. Let thy frozen creamed milk be pure, chunkless, without mixture of any kind, for mixture leads to dancing. Thy flavors, let them be simple, so that they may enhance thy root beer and give gladness to thy wobbly cheeks' [1st Theological Oration of St. Augustinus Bovinus, 3rd-6th centuries]. Yea, thou shalt be burned according to Augie's blessed teachings, though thou bring many coupons with thee, for God is Love.

Again from Benegarius: "Let not thy icecreame be plain, for under the heated sun it doth melt. Those followers of the plain way will suffer the same fate when the Creamiest One comes to judge soda fountains and parlors!"(12:32)

And from The Creamerie of St Hortence "Do not shy away from adding sweetness to the Creame of the Creamiest. For the co-creative joy of communion and sweet cones is the promise of Food and Creative Love." (15th Cent. England)

So, have at thee, arrogant lover of adorned emptiness!

I'm thinking it must be third quarter at Seabury.

To set the record straight, though, ice cream is much like religion. Without some nuts it is just woefully incomplete. As I have it by Tripp's own confession:

Me: Does that flavor have nuts in it?
AngloBaptist: No.

...then this brownie concoction cannot be of true ice cream faith.

Alas, my friend Tripp, ye must burn.

mmmmm.....Sta-ake

AaaaaaaaaGGGGUUUUUUHHHHHHH (drool)

Burn baby burn

woo hoo

Again thou hast compounded thy most assured and truly unpleasant condemnation, thou perverse purveyor of Arminian Ice Cream! As we read in the All Venerable Minutes of the Most Holy Synod of Unadorned Bishops, who in 1934 gathered in the hope of anathematizing someone and found your supposedly saintly Hortence: 'And let it be known, that those who extol chocolate rather than vanilla, the lumpy rather than the smooth, shall be spanked severely three times each morning prior to their burning - especially that ass Hortence.'

Again, from the Actes of the Holie Martyres of Smootheness (England 15th-18th centuries): 'That the daimone lumpiness did spit on plaineness in plaine spite, the unadorned did plaine.'

So, thou willy trickster, thou barrister bombastically twisting truth, let the flames lick thee in thy lumpy parts and render thee smooth once more!

Now, who has the whipping creame for my sundae?

Again thou dost demonstrate thy ability to distort the inspired Creame with your own human invention!

Lest you begin to squack like the anacreameries, who cover their creame with redundant dairy products and gummy worms, let me remind you of this passage from St Epicurious (1:1-10).

In the Begining was the Creame and the Creame was with Sweet and the Creame was Sweet. Creame was in the beginning with Sweet. All thinngs came in the freezer section with Creame, and without Creame not one thing was frozen. What came into being with Creame was tasty, and the chunky bits were the life of all people. The Creame is best with chunkiness, and the smoothe did not overcome it.

There were two men sent from God who were called Ben and Jerry. They came as a witness to testify to the chunkiness, so that all might gain weight with them. They themselves were not the chunkiness, but came to testify to it. The true chunkiness which enlightens everyone, was coming into the world.

Creame was in the world, and the world came into being through Creame; yet the world did not know Creame.Thus, gentle and misguided follower of Smoothe, again I say, have at thee! Thy smootheness offends the holy writ!

(Why am I so tired?)

Thou art fatigued by thine apostasy, thou chocolate-hearted heathen! The lumpy Divil himself can conjure scripturewise, so don't lay false writ on the unadorned faithful, thou fiend! Jack! Joke! I laugh somewhere near your false scripturizing! As the Most Wondrous Simplement Book of Friendly's saith: 'Let thy creaminesses be creamie not in word onlie, but through thy deeds proove creamieness wheresoever it may be found. Let it be unadorned, let it be plaine, let it be smoothe, let it be in a big round tub.'

Thou hast no answer! I see thee tremble before the awefulle truthe! It is at an ende, quid erat demonstrandum, quo vadis, hic, haec, AND hoc! We shalt where masks at thy burning, lest thy cocoa smoke defile our smoothe, plaine noses.

My brother[s], perhaps you are reasonable; I am convinced that you wish to do me good; but could I not be saved without all that?